I started this blog for women like me, in midlife who feel a need to do something new. Sometimes we feel forced to make changes, sometimes we feel what has been described as a “divine discontentment,” or “wonderlust,” a sense that there is something more. For some of us, the catalyst for change might be loss or divorce, the launching of our children, a milestone birthday, changes that are forced upon us through these trying times in which we live that ultimately gives us the psychological push to become something quite different than who we have been before.
More a dozen years ago I became a single mother to two teenage girls. When I look back, I am amazed at what I have accomplished, I have successfully launched two girls into wonderful careers and relationships, bought and sold houses and so much more. I have built a satisfying career, I”ve written a few self published books, and developed amazing friendships.
As we wrap up another school year, I can’t help but wonder what is ahead; another year that looks the same as the last or something completely different? My future, and yours is blank canvas, that is totally up to us to fill.
Most of us believe that our history determines the future, and that is mostly true, but I’ll bet that there are people that you know personally or have come into contact with, who through sheer determination have decided that they will change their circumstances, to shift gears and redefine who they have been. They may start a business. Did you know that a huge number of small business startups are by women in their 50’s? They might finally lose weight, sell everything and move to a new town. One of my good friends decided to walk the Camino de Santiago when she turned 60. I am in awe.
There are two types of people, those who take control of their lives and those who passively sit by and let life happen to them. Which one will you be?
I believe we are 100% responsible for our lives. This does not mean that things don’t happen to us that we didn’t want. We are all affected by outside circumstances. We all have negative things that happen, the difference between those who recognize personal responsibility will rally to make things better. Others will fall under the weight of the circumstance. It is all a matter of perspective.
We could be at the beginning of something very powerful. There is something that happens during middle aged women, it suddenly feels like it is our turn. We have spent a lifetime catering to the desires of others, we have sacrificed for our partner’s career, we have given time, money and energy to our children, and now, it is our turn at bat, and we aren’t going to are no longer willing to give up our dreams for someone else’s. It is our time to blossom.
One of my favourite practices is journalling. Crack open your notebook and answer this:
If you knew that you absolutely could not fail, what would you do that you’re aren’t doing now?
I’d love to hear some of your ideas. Write them in the comments.
